Wednesday, November 7th, Day Sixty-Four, Home
My husband came home today. Soon I will need a new home.
If you would like to join me in this journey from the beginning, please start with Day One.
Today I brought my husband home from the rehab center. On the way home, we got a wheelchair from the loan closet, visited the condo, and stopped at Wendy’s. We managed to get out of the jeep and into the residence without the help of security.
After we got home, I set up a doctor’s appointment for him and an appointment with a nurse from Home Support.
As soon as he got home, he wanted to drink. I had hid his alcohol this morning and wrenched my back in the process. I told him that his son and I had gotten rid of it. It was all he could talk about for the next while. I gave him some potato chips, which he ate. I could not interest him in anything else. He crawled into the bedroom and laid down on the floor.
I am feeling emotionally down. I doubt I can keep my husband from drinking, but I do not want to encourage it either. He has had over one month of in-patient medical treatment, and this has not been his first time. I hoped rehab would get him walking again, but it has not. I do not know if his lack of ability is caused by age, weakness, lack of confidence, lack of balance, or lack of coordination. It may be all five of those things. What am I to do?
Less Than One Month Before I Need a New Home
I have less than one month before I need a new home. I am hoping the executive director will give me a grace period. I realize he has given me a grace period already, but I did not know about the policies here until October third. I suspect that our situation came to the executive director’s attention when I applied for medical services. I was told I could not get medical services here as a non-resident, but my husband asked me to try again, so I did. I applied, and shortly afterwards we had a visit from the executive director, when he asked me to leave. I thought he was just going to sign me up as a resident.
Let me gather my courage and deal with my situation while looking for a new home. I have a crisis line number from the network I get my counseling from. I also have a 24-hour number from my doctor’s office. So I have two places I can call at any time for medical help for myself. I nearly lost it earlier today at the rehab center. I pounded my husband’s walker against the floor, several times in frustration. I am starting to crack under the stress and missing a day of medication did not help that.
Maybe it will not be so bad to get a home separate home from my husband as my step-son suggests. That way I can have some space away from my husband, and he can have some space away from me. Marriage is not supposed to be that way however.
I took my husband to the medical center this morning. We have been in crisis mode most of the day. Thankfully, I was able to get a shower before we left our residence this morning. I am still bone tired, and have obviously not been able to do much writing.
My husband still wants to move out of here and live with me, but I am starting to see how much he needs this place. The uncertainty is kind of getting to me.